Two retired psychologists, both 83, stood before roughly 100 neighbors, friends and family on a Friday in July and chanted Hebrew verses they had first learned as 13-year-old boys seven decades earlier. Sanford Braver and William Soltz, who live down the hall from each other at Wesley Palms Retirement Community in San Diego's Pacific Beach neighborhood, had restudied their portions for the joint celebration.
Braver was inspired to mark a second bar mitzvah because his own father had done the same, and he talked Soltz into joining him after learning that Soltz's older brother had set a similar precedent, according to San Diego Jewish World. The two men met at Wesley Palms after moving into the facility, the outlet reported. Braver moved to the Pacific Beach community last year, according to The San Diego Union-Tribune.
Why Age 83 Carries Special Meaning
A traditional bar mitzvah takes place when a boy turns 13 and reads from the Torah for the first time, the Union-Tribune notes. The custom of a second ceremony at 83 is rooted in Psalm 90, which frames 70 years as the measure of a human life, making age 70 a symbolic fresh start and age 83 a second passage into adulthood. My Jewish Learning explains that, unlike a childhood bar mitzvah, which is obligatory in Jewish tradition, the second ceremony at 83 is an optional custom that emerged in the late 20th century, treating the milestone as a metaphorical return to age 13, as My Jewish Learning describes it.
The practice has been embraced by notable figures before. Actor Kirk Douglas marked his second bar mitzvah in 1999, while Judith Kaplan Eisenstein observed hers in 1992, 70 years after becoming the first American girl to celebrate a bat mitzvah in 1922, according to JLife OC. Adult bar and bat mitzvah ceremonies have grown steadily across American Jewish life since the 1970s, the publication notes, giving seniors, Holocaust survivors and women historically excluded from childhood rites a structured way to reaffirm their faith.
Two Careers Spent Studying the Human Mind
Braver earned his doctorate in social psychology at the University of Michigan, according to his Arizona State University profile. During his career, he authored the 1998 book Divorced Dads: Shattering the Myths, drawn from a major federally funded study, and served as a consultant to President Clinton's National Fatherhood Initiative, according to the same profile. His research included a 2003 study on parental relocation after divorce and children's best interests, published on PubMed.
Soltz is a clinical psychologist.
Restudying Torah Portions After 70 Years
Rabbi Alexis Pearce, the Wesley Palms chaplain, tutored both men as they restudied their portions, San Diego Jewish World reported. Pearce previously served from 1996 to 2005 as spiritual leader of Congregation Dor Hadash, San Diego's Reconstructionist synagogue established in 1983, and now works as a board-certified hospice chaplain.
A Community Built for Second Chapters
Wesley Palms, located in Pacific Beach, is operated by Front Porch Communities and Services, a non-profit, non-sectarian organization; the campus was originally founded under Methodist Church auspices before becoming non-sectarian, according to San Diego Jewish World. Braver discussed Wesley Palms' Jewish community. The Union-Tribune covered the ceremony. For two men who spent their careers studying the human mind, the Friday ceremony offered a chance to return, once more, to the texts of their boyhood.
