A brown paper bag left on Dave Portnoy's doorstep in Saratoga Springs, New York, triggered a visit from local police who treated it as a possible bomb threat before determining it was nothing more than a pizzeria's attempt to get his attention. The bag, addressed to the Barstool Sports founder, carried a cheeky message signed by a Philadelphia pizza shop hoping for a review.
Police Called Over a Pizzeria's Doorstep Stunt
Saratoga Springs Police responded to a report of a suspicious package left on the doorstep, according to q1057.com. Officers treated the package as possibly a bomb threat, the outlet reported, and opened it to check for any danger. Inside was a brown bag bearing a message that read, “El Presidente, King of the Scumbags. Go birds! - Joseph's Pizza Parlor.”
The investigation found nothing to be concerned about, per the same report. The package had actually been delivered to Portnoy's home by staff from Joseph's Pizza Parlor, a Fox Chase restaurant in Northeast Philadelphia, as an attempt to get the review king's attention, according to Dexerto. One Joseph's employee recalled thinking the brown bag on the doorstep could cause trouble, while another employee predicted nothing would come of it, Dexerto reported. Police reportedly left Portnoy an apology note explaining the situation once the mix-up was sorted out.
A Score of 8.1 for the Fox Chase Staple
Portnoy ultimately decided to visit Joseph's Pizza Parlor after the misunderstanding was resolved, and he landed on a score of 8.1 out of 10, per Dexerto's report. He praised the pizzeria's old-school atmosphere, its interior, and its sourdough crust, which he described as amazing. The review was reportedly one of seven pizza reviews Portnoy completed that day, and he noted he was already full before even getting to Joseph's.
Joseph's Pizza Parlor sits at 7947 Oxford Ave. in Philadelphia and has been a Fox Chase staple for years, according to the Philadelphia Inquirer. The shop's opening year is itself disputed: 6abc reports the restaurant opened its doors in 1967, while the restaurant's own website states it was opened in 1966 by Fox Chase resident Joseph DiLullo. Its crust is a naturally fermented sourdough made with organic flour and a bit of whole wheat flour, a Joseph's representative told 6abc.
Philadelphia magazine gave the spot two stars in a 2023 write-up, recommending it to diners already in the neighborhood. Staff at Joseph's reportedly cheered and applauded after Portnoy announced his score, and according to Dexerto, the restaurant had only followed Portnoy on Instagram beforehand. Portnoy has referred to Philadelphia sports fans as “scumbags” for years, the outlet noted, a running bit reflected in the package's “Go birds” signoff.
Why Pizzerias Chase the Portnoy Bump
The stunt reflects just how much weight a single Portnoy score can carry for a small shop. His high pizza-review scores have caused some restaurants to become overwhelmed with customers, Dexerto has reported separately, and the pattern shows up across multiple cases. Gianni's Deli and Pizza was overwhelmed with orders within days of its review video going live, with what is usually a three-person operation ballooning to as many as eight workers at once, per Dexerto.
Bucky's Pizza in Chatham, New Jersey, told PMQ that its sales rose 180% year over year after an 8.5 score from Portnoy in June, with the shop turning out more than 400 pizzas a day and adding an early shift to keep up. Customers reportedly drove in from as far as Virginia just to try the pizza. As Slate has reported, a good review from Portnoy can be genuinely transformative, with shops like Sauce in New York and DeLucia's Brick Oven Pizza in Raritan, New Jersey, previously running out of dough or menu items entirely after high scores. Slate notes that after more than 1,000 reviews, only 22 pizzerias had scored a 9.0 or above as of its reporting — context that makes Joseph's 8.1 a solid showing, even if it falls short of that rarefied tier.
